


Searching For A Hand That Fits Just Right

by revenblue



Series: [collection] but you keep spinning 'round me just the same (Perryshmirtz) [57]
Category: Phineas and Ferb
Genre: Drabble Sequence, F/M, Holding Hands, M/M, POV Second Person, Perryshmirtz is endgame, ships listed in the order they appear
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-25
Updated: 2018-12-25
Packaged: 2019-09-26 17:43:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17146208
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/revenblue/pseuds/revenblue
Summary: When you were a child, you were always confused by the story of Fair-Haired Porridge Child, listening through the bedroom door while Mother read to Roger. Surely she should have stuck to the first one?Youwould have.Turns out, it's not that simple.





	Searching For A Hand That Fits Just Right

You hadn't had much to compare it to, back then. The touch of her fingers against yours, faint but lingering. Not enough. But you'd taken that, because what other option was there? Complain, ask for more, drive her away? No, you _couldn't_. Even the thought was more than you could bear.

So you'd stayed, and you'd smiled, and you'd ignored the part of you saying it wasn't enough. If you could be what she wanted, you'd _be_ wanted, and that was already more than you deserved.

She'd left anyway, pulling her hand away for the last time.

"I'm sorry, Heinz."

* * *

You don't remember this, not consciously. But your hands know. Even without flesh and blood, the ache of it's imprinted itself in your bones, one of many keeping you up at night.

He'd been who you could have, if you weren't so weak. He's strong. Forceful. A leader. A tyrant.

_Evil_.

(Cruel.)

Once, you'd thought _yourself_ Evil. After all, "Evil is born from pain and loss," and you'd-

But, no. That wasn't it at all.

True evil is his delight in causing pain. His nemesis reduced to a puppet. His hand crushing yours.

You wake up, shivering. "Only a nightmare..."

* * *

You hadn't expected him to, that first time. Sure, you'd _asked_ , but that's never meant much in the past. Besides, he's your _nemesis_ , it's probably against his rules or something.

Either way, his little paw'd slid into your hand anyway, just firm enough to say he won't let go, and your heart had skipped a beat. How long had you been waiting to hear just that?

Long enough to give up hope.

He's still here now, curled in beside you, his paw wrapped around your finger. Glancing up at you, he chirrs, and you smile.

"Thank you, Perry the Platypus."

**Author's Note:**

> Ugh, titling this was a nightmare.
> 
> Incidentally, I didn't realise the thematic similarities to Goldilocks until I was actually titling it, and that's after it spent like a month in written-on-actual-physical-paper limbo.
> 
> Also, there is not _nearly_ enough selfcest handholding out there ~~I say, as I don't tag this as selfcest~~.


End file.
